I get frustrated analyzing the load different athletes seem able to respond positively to. Cumulative load that exceeds anything I’ve ever done; more training volume, worse eating habits, lacking supplementation, super stress to perform. But the reality seems I am less robust and my margin for error demands more delicate care than for most. This to say I don’t feel I was doing anything really radical in a traditional context of “over training syndrome” – not even close to that edge really. But then redefining my understanding of that state of being – I was on the edge for sure.
(Mixing my muesli – Seems I eat a small child’s worth every week…)
A few emails came in after Monday’s post – some just mocking the convict mountain man appearance – but many asking for more detail. To start – I had no reason to tidy myself until my Greek yoghurt and muesli got distracted by creepers over the top lip. It was the first time I wondered how it works, a beard and all, does one really need to trim the upper hair? How did Tom Hanks do it in Cast Away then… I did like the feeling when swimming a lot – likened to a tingly smoothness.
As for going hypoglycemic: Well, that’s the easy part. I was getting the majority of my energy from fat. Plenty nuts, seeds, eggs, oils, etc. I’d not take any Enduren in my water bottles unless it was beyond a three hour ride, or unless there was quality in it. And longer stuff just nuts mostly. Teaching the system to forage for fat stores first – which is a far cleaner fuel without lactic acid as a byproduct and has in itself far more energy, more than double that of carbs. The glycogen sparing can be befinificial when racing. Thats vague concept at least. I had read into the counter arguments, the limitations to fat loading. It was a fascinating experiment within myself, mostly feeling just so much healthier than I had on a past of ‘fat-free’ nutrition. I was needing less sleep, woke with clarity, had clearer eyes and better skin. Seemed to have less inflamation and more flexibility. In all my body was rocking and seemed to have been wanting this change for a long time.
Most days were started on a coffee and a session – sometimes just a jog, or a full swim session, or even a two hour long run before eating anything. There is a time and place for depletion efforts, just not as regular as I was pushing into. All meals and snacks were trying to be balanced with the three major food groups, and were eaten more frequently in lesser volumes, trying to control blood sugar levels. My meals were loaded with raw natural foods all dense in fiber. Most nights I could not take another mouthful I would be so full of grub, but I was probably underplaying my protein in particular, and possibly even overall energy intake despite eating as much as I could stomach. Protein at night seems to be most vital, and I was gettting most mine over lunch at Greengate.
Read some fascinating research by the Institute of Sport in Australia saying its not practical for endurance athletes to up their protein intake to the daily need of 1.5g/kg body weight unless supplemental protein was taken. The article proposed endurance athletes were bound to forsake optimal recovery and eventually get into an ill state if staying at the usual 1g/kg body weight. As I never counted nothing, weighed nothing, and was trying to be guided by intuition – I had a look retrospectively, and I was under even the 1g level. I had wanted to slim on muscle mass so was purposefully going easy on protein. I’d done great strength work for the first time and was nervous of gaining mass, even if all the reading for that specific stimulus of training suggested I wouldn’t gain any mass, just better recruitment, but still I cut Cut despite eventually being 10% lighter than when I started. Most South African’s over eat on meat, and I do feel much healthier when eating less. Ingrid at Greengate would occasionally catch me out for missing on the chicken broccoli pie… I guess when leaving Greengate goodness for the USA I was always going to be in trouble. Greengate had become the backbone of my health. Anyhow, protein, it seems protein was my great achilles heal.
I’ve expanded on the nutrition as that created the platform. But I honestly feel that the race travel to Brazil, after racing Sani2C and some Giro, doing two events in Brazil, coming back with a viral infection, getting stressed figuring tax and new bank accounts and doing a shoot in Durban and race in Langebaan and a showing at the 2OCeans Expo all add up. Getting to Truckee, feeling stressed not coming right but with the first race looming, all add up. Alas.
So I rested for two weeks while running numerous blood tests at greatest expense but nothing showed as a state of endocrine dysfunction is not a pathological state. Most my blood levels were brilliant actually, including my iron stores which I suspected to be low after limiting meat. Once I was able to connect the dots to from my HPA axis to sitting on the couch watching film after film, I could start making the needed changes. Such as a protein shake just before going to bed. Even now, weeks later, I can feel in the morning by a faint grogginess whether I did take the shake or not. Added three helpings of Glutamine to my day, plenty vitamin C and other basics, and some naturopathic adrenal support medication. I would eat two meals when someone mentioned the work hunger and started forcing nutrition while training, even if laughably short in duration.
I should in hindsight have left altitude immediately, I can see that now, and Libby did call for it. But I’ve spent a few years making Truckee my second home, and was comfortable there and wholly expectant of the phenomenal mountain biking to restore my joy. But winter kept rolling on and on. Even the snow loving locals were up in arms. I am not tough by any measure and really battled to get out into the teeth of it day after day. Especially when seconding guessing how much to push or not, what felt like normal ‘unfit discomfort’ or what was real lingering ill health. Alas.
My family in Truckee have been going through a testing time. I stayed and supported as best I could, but got to last weekend – the expiry of my welcome – and was spent in every sense. I was emotionally fragile and still struggling to find rhythm and flow training wise. Decided it was time to pack it in and get out to my own pillow in Stellenbosch. It was hard packing it in, I love the family there and the town’s quirkyness and had built some good relationships.
The only other emotion was a desire to the see that girl that left in New York. She seemed to leave toward the Virginia direction, so I booked a ticket and within 24hours nine large boxes were taped up (3 Bike boxes, 2 wheel boxes, 1 box of tires, 1 box of spares, 1 box of Enduren [smuggled into USA], 1 box of clothes) and left in a friends basement and I sat in seat 9D. I realised changing my flight home from New York would be stupidly dear, but I was heading East either way, and when the quote finally returned from the agency I had put out feelers with a mate in Boulder, CO.
(As you can see master Johan – I did tidy up. She upped the incentive more than the yoghurt did.)
So that’s been a week, being in Richmond, being out, breathing, trying to figure where to next. Trying to figure how to turn a funk around that’s sent me hiding for too long into something positive. The girl has been gentle and accepting of my fragile state, Richmond has been younger and more inspiring than expected, and I am feeling life return to my soul.
It so happens that the Xterra in Richmond is this coming weekend. I had no intention of toeing the line, but have been reminded of how fun the trail system is down here. Its uber technical and if ever there was a course to enjoy as an unfit athlete, this be it. So just emailed back to Truckee, to ask for a Fedex shipment of my race suit and other missing bits. Had my bike shipped last weekend after realising I’d prefer to buy some time here. It would be like arriving at an art show as an artist, with no work prepared. But, perhaps this will ignite a dwindling flame.
Between getting down to sea level, getting an overdue massage and letting go of emotions I was feeling like I could move again for the first time on a run last Friday night. Honest, that specific, that much of a change from one day to the next. So too on the bike on Saturday – suddenly more fluid and smooth. In part the sweet sensations were accentuated after I’d ridden a borrowed rig in the week, which had the breaks opposite to my left rear right front setup. But there it was, finally feeling more myself. Finally a desire to lift the pace, press down harder and an ability recover as normal by the next day. Its been warm with saturated humidity – so different from Truckee. As opposed to not seeing a soul in the forests, I am now swerving through tattooed students heading to the river for a swim. The change has been good to me.
Perhaps a few more days here after the event, and then to Boulder for a few weeks, and potentially most the summer. Its the endurance sport mecca of America – one of the iconic locations I’d always wanted to experience. I’ve learnt not to plan too far ahead now, seems my path is as predictable as BP’s ability to seal a pipe. So will have to keep you posted.
This is definitely not the last time I’ll be getting it dreadfully wrong. And if you’re keen to follow the blog, you’ll have to endure the lows with the highs. Thanks again for the countless messages through this time. Rather moving.
I’m in a coffee shop now. Aptly called “Lift”. It’s in a part of town thats making a revival. So art galleries mix with gangsters on the same block. And it seems fitting to be here.
