“Still no reply. What a dick.”

Not often I get one-liners that keep me thinking for a few days. This one did. My immediate reaction as a recovering people pleaser in and out of rehab, was to internalize and figure the substance, if any, in the accusation. His anger has made me analyze my odd life and what its become, what it hasnt. A healthy process surely. Anyhow, my correspondence is a shambles at best, justified and suppressed in a maze of excuses. But its a part of who I am for now. And I want to thank everyone for the notes, comments, letters and subscriptions, and apologise to the countless I dont get back to.

Its Friday night. Wish I was at Langebaan with the family, but need to be off to Natal for the second Jeep Apparel Mutlisport event on Sunday, and so still in a long-weekend-deserted Stellenbosch for the night. Which affords me a little time behind the desk – time I actively try to limit and minimize. Tonight, like always, there is more on the list than I can get to. There will always be.

I am a one mand band trying to balance training, recovery, marketing, PR, logistics, and entertainment. Its a band often playing to the procrastination tune – a single halting new releases for ages now. I know that each of these departments could be better managed, more effectively deployed. I will always strive to, but the one man band’s longevity relies as much on rest and relaxation as corporate success drive.

I had another letter this week:

asking for a signed photo. Pretty special. I cant even write a legible shopping list, and this is in perfect form, effort taken. The notes trickle in, many strangers, some old acquaintances. All really encourage and fuel the fire. Big appreciation.

I always read all. I take it in. I dont always reply, but its always read.

I regret not being able to give more advice to the enquiring emails, the ones starting out and bursting with excitement at the thrill of outside sports. I hit and miss here and there. Alas.

Ryan Frank Mason from Durban, a guy I’ve never met (and hope never to), sent the note in heading. It does rock my boat, something I’ll have to manage going forward. Yes, I could have replied. I did at the start, to a total stranger, but not to the third, forth and five notes. Once niggled I struggle to reverse my sentiments.

Either way, its a pity the one and only negative note I’ve received is getting time, and the 100′s positive did not. But I believe it was a constructive exercise.